Beige Whales (2022-11-10)

brook > pcs > wishlist

As I've only been sourcing secondhand items from the Amazon Marketplace, certain things have been difficult to track down. Here are a few items I think are cool as fuck, but would actually have little practical use for. (H/T Cathode Ray Dude for the nickname.)

Computers

Tandy 1000 TX (286 desktop)

While the Pentium-equipped PC5094 Phenom-equipped PC5004C can handle anything I throw at it, it'd be super cool and Aesthetic(tm) to have a genuine '80s computer for older DOS programs.

Toshiba Libretto 110CT (ultracompact Pentium laptop)

Go watch one video about these things and tell me it's not the coolest shit you've ever heard of.

Unisys CWD-4002 (compact 486 desktop)

Another cool little item is this DOS PC smaller than a pizza box.

Corsair One (microtower PC)

As much as I like to put them together myself, this is a very nice-looking and well-made prebuilt.

OQO Model 2 (UMPC)

Back in the 2000s, handheld computers seemed like some straight up technowizardry. Major cool factor on these, but the appeal dried up as my desire to leave the house slowly vanished.

Asus Flow Z13 (gaming tablet)

Desktop-replacement class tablet with a 12900H, 3050Ti, 16GB RAM, and 1TB SSD. Would be both a nice upgrade and more efficient. But, future expansion is an uncertainty, and I prefer all-AMD systems for better Linux compatibility.

FM Towns II UX20 (DOS/V AIO)

Gorgeous compact all-in-one 386SX system.

Components

3Dfx Voodoo (PCI GPU)

3D accelerator which would be useful for more demanding mid-90s games.

Gravis UltraSound (ISA APU)

The ultimate sound card for DOS gaming.

Omni-Booting Custom Build

Seeing Windows 98 on running on bare-metal Ryzen gave me the tremendously stupid idea of loading an ATX case up with an RTX, some 2000s GPU, S3 Trio, and PCI SoundBlaster, then installing Every version of Windows on its drives. Be super fuckin cool if I could actually pull it off, but I'm not willing to spend the money needed to try it.

IBM Incompatibles

Commodore Plus/4

A more obscure system that the homebrew scene is doing interesting things with. But, I'm more likely to grab a Turbo Chameleon MiSTer instead of genuine hardware.

Macintosh Color Classic (with Apple IIe card)

These are nice little compact systems.. which means they're rare now.

Peripherals

Acer KB-101A (mechanical keyboard)

Buckling springs may be nice, but blue ALPS is in a league of its own.

MadCatz Panther XL

Badass trackball plus joystick controller that looks like it'd be a great way to play some classic games.

Roland SC-55mkII (MIDI interpreter)

One of the gold standards for DOS game music, but there's no way in hell I'm gonna drop $125+ on one, be it hardware or VST.

Samsung Odyssey+ (VR headset)

I'd always look at it and think about how I could've bought one for $250 new during Black Friday 2019 (as opposed to $500+ used now).

HP ThinkJet 2225C (Dot-inkjet printer)

Adorable, functional, and still usable? Want.

Samsung SCX-4500 (Laser MFP)

Super compact mono laser printer that looked like the Height Of Technology back in 2007.

Gaming

Vectrex (console)

I'd love to have one, but they've long passed the 'more expensive than a mid-range GPU' threshold.

Retro Electronik Supergun (interface)

These JAMMA adapters to play genuine arcade hardware at home would be an interesting way to start a collection.

PC Engine (and Super SD System 3)

This is a console I never got into, but wouldn't mind doing so.

Atari Lynx Model 2

Funky chunky handheld.

Arcade1Up Cabinets

It would be pretty badass to walk up and play on a physical machine. Unfortunately, I already own Namco and Midway arcade compilations for the PS2, so I can't justify these.

Retrode 2 (ROM dumper)

Cool idea, but as I already have a full collection of DMCA-exempt ROMs, there'd be no point in having one, except to preserve save files.

A/V Equipment

Sony TC-KA1ES (tape deck)

"They don't make 'em like they used to" certainly applies to cassette players. I currently have a handheld unit in my hifi setup, and wouldn't mind upgrading to some proper equipment.

Pioneer CLD-2070 or DVL-700 (laserdisc player)

LaserDisc is an interesting format, but I couldn't justify getting into it just to watch the Star Wars trilogy.

Panasonic DMR-EZ47V (combo VCR/DVD player)

Retro reciever that takes in RF, composite, S-Video, and component, and spits it out as HDMI. Might've been a good deal if I jumped on it quite a long time ago, but I'll just have to live with the VCR and PVR I did get.

Handheld Devices

Panasonic PV-SD5000 (digital camera)

This is the enhanced model of the 4090, a SuperDisk camera that I do have. The extra 2MP would be a nice upgrade.

Sidekick 3 (mobile phone)

These were #goals back in the day.

Chiappa Rhino 40DS (.357 revolver)

Futuristic-looking little gun.

Paragon Warlock (knife)

Spotted one of these in a video about knives you only hand to knife guys, went 👀, then saw the price tag of $300.

Sony Mylo COM-1 and/or Nokia N810 (web/chat nuggets)

Interesting relics, but I already got a COM-2 and can't justify spending more money than it cost for something even less capable.

Hide & Drink Pouch

I barely even go outside to get groceries, why the fuck do I want one of these.

Missed Connections

2011: Cancelled-Preorder 3DS

I was initially hyped enough for the next Nintendo handheld to preorder it.. but I then looked at my GBA SP and DS Lite, and decided to cancel the order and wait for the inevitable improved hardware revision.

2012: Samsung E840 (feature phone)

Eyed this slick slider phone for a long time. But decided to see what this Android business was about and went with the Defy Mini instead.

2015: Amazon Fire Phone

Was going to upgrade to one due to being in my Amazon Enjoyer phase, but it was discontinued two days after I learned it existed. Ended up staying on my Nokia X3-02 until 2018. The $90 that I would've spent on the device was instead used to order a crate of root beer directly from Sprecher Brewery.

2018: AeroGarden (hydroponic plantbed)

There's something alluring about growing your own herbs and peppers, but that's spending $100 to save 70¢.

2019: Flashforge Adventurer (3D Printer)

Suffers from the chicken-and-egg problem of I'd have no idea what to do with one until I actually have it.

2020: Refurbished New 3DS XL

Later on, I found out Nintendo was directly selling refurbished units for $120. Promptly bookmarked the page, then forgot about it until the platform's discontinuation was announced and they were no longer available. Prices for used units have since doubled.

Buybacks

(Things I once had that have since disappeared, and would be interesting to explore again.. but no practical modern use exists beyond that single hit of nostalgia.)

199?: Casio PDA (Cassiopeia E-10?)

Or, as I called it, the "Casio-pedia". Probably a hand-me-down from my dad when he upgraded to something newer. Functioned as a portable journal for me. At some point the tip fell out of the stylus. Was still usable, but a bit awkward.

2001: Data organizer (Casio SF-3905A?)

I later had a small pocket unit that had a ~16x4 character screen with teal-green backlight. Wrote some memos on that thing about the Days I had.

2005: Mattel Juice Box (blue)

One of those weird 'personal media players' with its own proprietary video cartridge format.

2006-2018: Old cellphones

Every phone I used more than 5 years ago (RAZRv3, W259/W270, Defy Mini, Captivate Glide, Touch and Type) has also Mysteriously Vanished. But, the only thing I could do with them nowadays would be display them.

2010: Sony Dream Machine ICF-C707

My former primary alarm clock and FM radio that I picked up during my Sony fanboy phase. Had it for about five years. No fucking idea where it went.

2013: Sony CECHYA-0080 wireless headset

Still have the transciever dongle, and just know that the second I throw that out the headset will magically show up again.

Listen to "Stewart Copeland - Tree Tops" on YouTube?